There’s something I’m seeing more and more across leadership teams right now.

Leaders are being asked to operate at an even higher level than ever before, often with fewer resources while navigating constant change, and teams that are also feeling stretched.

And leaders are asking themselves, ‘How do I sustain this?’

Recently, I had the opportunity to keynote speak about Leadership Resilience and Navigating Change for a group of senior HR leaders at Co-operators.

What stood out wasn’t just the conversation—it was the willingness in the room to pause, reflect, and talk honestly about pressure, burnout, and what it really takes to lead in today’s environment.

There’s something interesting about this tree.

For some people, when they see it, they may think it’s dead. Irrelevant. Broken. On the verge of dying. That it no longer serves a purpose… and maybe should be cut down.

I’m no arborist. But when I look at it, through my lens as a resilience expert, I see something very different. I see something that has endured something incredibly challenging—something strong enough to force it to bend.

I see adaptation. I see a new purpose. Maybe it now offers shelter in a different way. Maybe it creates refuge for animals that wouldn’t have found it before. It’s still growing. Still blossoming. Leaves are still coming in. It’s still thriving—just in a different way.

And it got me thinking about the journey so many leaders are on right now. Trying to find their relevance. Carving a new, meaningful path within their current roles. Or quietly asking themselves… what could my next chapter look like?

This weekend, what started as a simple grocery run with my eldest daughter turned into one of those moments that shifted my perspective, and I am still carrying it with me.

If you have been feeling worried about scarcity or struggling with your own direction and purpose in the midst of chaotic times, this article is for you!

To see a picture of my family on social media, we looked almost perfect. Two beautiful little girls, an athletic, handsome husband, the quintessential golden retriever puppy, and me. Social media is this century’s biggest PR machine. But social media often doesn’t tell the story behind the photo.

My family is amazing, but we have been broken time and time again.

We all have different leadership styles. That is what makes us unique. Even if you try to emulate someone else, you are you. And you are bringing your own unique variation of style with you to each organization you go to.

But, does your current leadership style mean that is your natural and only style? No way!

I see and even help leaders shift their styles. As we grow and develop, we change. You can’t really go back to the way you were. You can’t un-know what you know. So how does someone who isn’t a ‘People’ person who has been a strong contributor for years and found themselves in a leadership role now managing, and yes, even motivating people, do it?

Here are 3 components of helping develop a stronger Leadership EQ:

I have had a lot of days over the past dozen years, that just getting out of bed felt like climbing Mount Everest. With debilitating headaches from the brain injury. I had a broken heart after my beloved husband Jeff died at 46 years old of cancer. And then the toll of home-schooling my 8 and 10-year-old children while running a business amid a pandemic while deep in grief. I felt like I was in survival mode every day.

I knew I couldn’t keep going down this path. Being in survival mode for a sustained period doesn’t end well, and I need to be here for my kids. I knew I couldn’t control what was happening in the world around me. But, I could take more control over what was happening inside me.

I began to see that so much really all comes down to perspective. 

Recently, my daughters and I had the great privilege of handing out two Jr. C Hockey Awards named in honor of my late husband/the girls' Dad, Jeff, who played for the team in his teens to early 20s.When I received the call that the Club had chosen Jeff for this award out of all the great guys who have played for this team over the years, I was very touched as I know Jeff would be.

This leads me to ask the question, what do I want my legacy to be? What do you want your legacy to be? A legacy is not created at the end of our lives, it is what we do and who we are leading up to our final moment. If you are not unsure about the answer to this big question, allow me to help you put some thought into it.