Who Am !?
I think this is a question we all ask ourselves at least once in our lives. For me, I seem to ask this question every few years. Just when I think I have the answer, something in my life shifts, and my life experiences evolve me into a different version of myself.
It can be fun experiences that allow us to grow, but I find change often comes when we have to dig deep within ourselves to get through a period of sadness, change, disappointment, or fear. Not dissimilar to the caterpillar in the cocoon, when we face struggle and challenge, we grow into something else.
As I reflect on this topic, I wonder why we even ask this question Who am I? It seems there is this fascination with us being able to put our finger on labeling things, including ourselves. I think part of it is looking for some certainty or maybe to feel we have something to offer the world.
Who we are is not the roles we play (leader, parent, etc. ) but it can be closely linked to that. When my husband was told he had terminal cancer, I felt like I couldn’t imagine a life without him. So much of me had been so closely linked to him. Yet I logically knew when he died, I still would have to go on. I was still me even if he no longer existed in physical form in this world. Our relationship profoundly shaped me, but it did not define me.
So I circle back to the question again, ‘What makes us who we are?’
Some people start with what we know we aren’t. For example, a person’s looks - whether you love what you see when you look in the mirror or not - it doesn’t define you because looks change over time. Yet, a person who defines themselves as good-looking or not, could fall into the trap of feeling this component of themselves contributes to their self-worth and how others feel about them. The same can be said of a leader’s “successful” business career. And then someday when they lose that part of themselves, they might feel lost themselves.
So maybe it is important to know who you really are so you don’t fall into the trap of attaching yourself to characteristics that really don’t matter at the end of the day.
After some reflection, here’s what have I come up with when I consider who I am.
I am someone who tries to be kind. I am resilient, playful, smart, and loving with almost every behaviour I make coming from a kind place within my heart. I am intolerant of a certain level of BS because I have learned through my experiences that life is short and I choose to limit my exposure the best I can to those who are unkind. I realize I am constantly evolving and ever-changing.
You may argue that these values could change over time, too. And guess what? You are right. The beauty of this question is that there is no definitive answer. But I do believe with every ounce of my being that a great deal of who I am is intangible, yet it transfers directly into every tangible outcome I produce through my business as well as my personal life.
So…Who Are You?
