The Power of Perspective

I have had a lot of days over the past dozen years, that just getting out of bed felt like climbing Mount Everest. With debilitating headaches from the brain injury. I had a broken heart after my beloved husband Jeff died at 46 years old of cancer. And then the toll of home-schooling my 8 and 10-year-old children while running a business amid a pandemic while deep in grief, I felt like I was in survival mode every day.

I knew I couldn’t keep going down this path. Being in survival mode for a sustained period doesn’t end well, and I need to be here for my kids. I knew I couldn’t control what was happening in the world around me. But, I could take more control over what was happening inside me.

I began to see that so much comes down to perspective.  I think it is important for us to stop and assess what is happening in the world around us.  We are hopefully emerging from a global pandemic that I don’t think any of us would have ever predicted, coupled with current political uncertainties in the world and horrific wars occurring right now while you read this article. So with all of that in perspective, I encourage you to cut yourself some slack and consider if doing the best you can, taking life one step at a time right now is okay, or more than okay.. What if you are actually thriving now considering the situation?

The narrative you tell yourself is key.  It is a very different story for me to say, “I am keeping the girls and dog fed, the house clean, work projects on schedule, and I manage to exercise every day because I make that a priority for me.  I am amazing!”  Versus, “I am just surviving.”  And here is the interesting thing from a physiological standpoint. When we send messages to ourselves that we are safe and thriving versus just surviving, every cell in our body picks up on that. 

Researchers have found that the way people feel about the stress in their lives is a far more powerful predictor of their general health – whether they’re more likely to be depressed, anxious, smoke, or overeat – than any other measures. The perception is more telling, even than actual stressful life events. So keeping your stresses in perspective is key to managing your mental and physical health.

Here is a practical work example for you. If you are committing to do a work project, you are going to do it no matter what. So decide what messages you want to tell yourself about it. Is it, “This is insane. I am so burnt out. I hate this. I am miserable.”  Or, “I am adding value. I am learning. I am growing. I am digging deep within myself.”

Now, if your schedule is insane on an ongoing basis. You need to make some hard decisions to preserve your energy. But once you have done that, look at the language you tell yourself and see if it could be closer aligned to the perspective you choose to have which can lead to a greater sense of fulfillment and peace of mind.

The really cool thing about choosing your perspective with purpose is that when you show up in this way, you impact others and can change the trajectory of their days, too.

When we connect with our colleagues, friends, and family with a perspective that feels in line with our values and how we want to be, it likely leads to more patience and kindness. When that is the way we relate to others, they are going to feel more relaxed, creative, and motivated. You have the ability to form stronger relationships, create positive energy around you, and motivate others, just by being intentional about your perspective. And this cycle continues as the more meaningful dialogue you have with others, the better you feel inside.

Perspective is massive. Try it and see!